When I started my blog the aim was to bring together women from different parts of the world and make them talk their hearts out. I really love hearing their stories and it is quite fascinating to see how all of us living miles apart are all connected by our common emotions, feelings, and gender-equality issues. Here’s a post by Huong Nguyen from Vietnam who has given a candid account of problems being faced by women in her country and tells why it is necessary for women to realize that they are the masters of their own happiness. Read her post and get inspired, ladies!
When I was a little young girl, it was normal that people had arranged marriage; women are taught to suffer, not to enjoy. Domestic violence happened without surprise. Children are beaten for wrong behaviors in their parents’ views. Women had no choice but to stay and obey parents, husbands, customs and norms. We would be considered as a good person if we were like sheep, listening to elderly and no ideas allowed.
Nowadays, the situation has changed, however mostly in big cities and provinces, in small town and villages there is still domestic violence and women still suffer.
In my teenage, I was taught that only men can bring us happiness and we must get married as soon as we reach the mid-20s or so (if not, they would call you like ‘stock/inventory’); because they hope having a man will change our life in a better way. Women do not have any other choices for themselves but to try to ‘keep the family’, and ‘have children’ no matter what.
I grew up observing women around me and kept asking myself: Are they Happy? If they are Happy for sure I will follow what they do.
However, 90% of my answer is No. Most of the women when they are young, they listened and did what the parents told them to. When they get married, they belong to their husband and husband’s family. They are forced to do what the husband tells them to because they are taught to believe that, only men can bring them life, happiness!
I stopped a while wondering myself: How will my life be? Where True Happiness can be found for a woman? If it is like what we were taught, why those women were not Happy at all?
After 5 years of studying about Happiness, and becoming a Happy Lady who has appeared on Happiness Lady Program on Vietnam Television, working on some women’s project; and being a Happiness Coach; I discovered that Happiness is a Choice. We are Women, we have the right to make choices the way we deserve, including Happiness.
Happiness to women can always come from within abundantly if we really learn to practice. If we only hope for the outsiders to bring us happiness, it may or may not happen. Your husband, or your boyfriend, your children can make you happy for some time, but no one can bring it all the time for you. What happens then? You get disappointed and angry. Consequently, it affects your career, people you work with, your family, your beloveds-everyone and everything. Once Happiness becomes a habit, people want to work with you, more opportunities come to you, the quality of your relationships increase, and hence the quality of life.
Consider yourself a pilot searching for happiness; If the pilot does not know where to land and depends on other people to guide him where to land; it becomes risky. If we depend on others to tell us the route to our life and happiness it will be risky for us. If we understand that Happiness is within us, we are riding in ‘safe airlines’, we can always drive to our destination safely! We must make sure we find our happiness to be a pilot of Always Airlines. 🙂
You may wonder how to be happy always? Every day you face so many tough things? Remember it is a choice. If life brings you a lemon, are you able to make lemonade with it? It is all about choice. There are many other reasons to make you happy if you really care.
Some tips to start finding happiness within:
- Think Positive. Everything has a solution, and Problems come to give us a lesson to discover our potentials and help us grow.
- Learn to meditate & watch our breath. Breaths are important if saying are everything but we often forget it. Understanding that you will find happiness is easy such as a breath.
- Love yourself. Love yourself and Love yourself. Have 100% passion for loving yourself so that you know what to bring best for you. Be the best lover and have a deep and secret love for yourself.
- Feed the mind with the right knowledge. Nonstop learning to develop, to ensure a healthy mind
- Live with appreciation to a small little thing like a flower… Appreciate and grateful with anything life bring about. It is just beautiful even enjoy the pain. As no pain, no gain.
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